What Women Who Age Well Actually Have in Common (It's Not What You Think)

They're crossing the Molokai Channel by canoe at 75.

They're hiking Koko Head Crater before sunrise at 80.

They are not in a geriatrician's office.

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Dr. Susan Christensen has spent more than 20 years as a geriatrician at the University of Hawaii School of Medicine, caring for women at the most vulnerable end of their lives. But she's also watched the women who never end up needing her — and what they have in common.

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We're super excited to have Dr. Christensen on The Clit Club Podcast! If you're in your 40s reading this and you're wondering how to prepare for the years ahead, the answer is more actionable (and surprising!) than you'd expect. Keep reading for our main takeaways from our conversation!

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What Is a "Super-Ager"?

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The term "super-ager" describes someone who maintains the physical and cognitive function of someone decades younger. These are not people who won the genetic lottery, but people who actually did the things that most people deprioritize in their health consistently and over a long period of time. They don't pay for expensive treatments or follow strict diets. Instead, they take care of their inner health — and most importantly, their mindset.

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These are the five main traits Dr. Christensen found during her practice:

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The Five Traits Women Who Age Well Actually Share

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1. They Develop Psychological Resilience

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This was the trait Dr. Christensen kept coming back to — and it's the one that surprises people most.

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It's not simply optimism or having had an easy life. It's something more specific: they don't dwell.

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When something bad happens in their lives, they don't spiral into it. Instead they ask: "Okay, this happened. What do I need to do to get back?" They process what's happened, they grieve if needed, and they move forward. No regrets, no ruminations.

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Chronic psychological stress is one of the most underappreciated drivers of accelerated aging. It disrupts cortisol regulation, increases systemic inflammation, impairs sleep, and raises cardiovascular risk. The women who age best, consciously or not, have found a way to metabolize difficulty rather than stay in it.

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The good news are: this is a skill that can be practiced! Therapy, meditation, journaling, strong community — all of these support the kind of psychological processing that prevents stress from accumulating into chronic inflammation.

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2. They Treat Physical Activity as Non-Negotiable

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The women still paddling canoes across open ocean at 75 didn't just "stay active." They built physical activity so deeply into their identity and daily routine that it was never something to get around to.

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Dr. Christensen is clear that the physical capacity to do those things at 75 and 80 is built in your 40s and 50s. You cannot wait until retirement to build the engine. The investment compounds over time — and so does the neglect.

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What counts:

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• Resistance training to preserve muscle mass and bone density (the two things most likely to determine whether you maintain independence)
• Cardiovascular fitness to protect heart and brain health
• Balance and mobility work (the difference between falling and not falling in your 70s)
• Activities you actually love (because consistency matters more than perfection)

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The women who age well are doing things that feel like living: hiking, swimming, paddling, dancing. Finding your version of that is the best investment for your future.

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3. They Prioritized Sleep

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Here's something Dr. Christensen said that reframes everything: "If you're not storing those memories now, you're not going to access them later."

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She was talking about sleep. And the connection between poor sleep in midlife and cognitive decline decades later is not hypothetical: it's one of the most robust findings in aging research.

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Sleep is when the brain consolidates memory. It's when the glymphatic system flushes the toxic proteins associated with Alzheimer's disease. It's when inflammation resets. The women who maintain sharp cognition into their 80s are those who took their sleep seriously.

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Perimenopause is one of the most disruptive periods for sleep in a woman's life. The hormonal shifts of the transition have a direct impact in your sleep quality. This is not something to endure in silence — It's something to address, ideally with a menopause-informed provider.

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4. They Have Rich Social Connections

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Social connection is one of the most underrated factors in longevity — and Dr. Christensen says she sees this repeatedly in her career.

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This is not about being "extroverted". It's about having people who know you, who notice if something's wrong, who you're accountable to, who you laugh with. The research on social isolation and early mortality is striking: chronic loneliness is as harmful to health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.

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For women in midlife, who are often deep in caregiving roles, career demands, and the invisible labor of holding households together, real social connection frequently gets prioritized. The women who age best found ways to protect it anyway.

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Dr. Christensen also pointed out a practical aspect of this factor: financial and legal autonomy. Women who have their own financial accounts, who have established relationships with their own bankers and lawyers, who have completed advance care directives, are far better protected when these cognitive changes happen.

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5. They Did the Unsexy, Invisible Work

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Perhaps the most honest thing Dr. Christensen said on the podcast was this: the rewards for the things that actually matter aren't tangible.

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Nobody sees your bone density. Nobody compliments your VO2 max. When you skip the Sephora sale to go lift weights, there's no immediate payoff. When you go to bed at 10 p.m. instead of scrolling, nobody applauds you.

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But the women who are still thriving at 80 have already invested in things where the returns are invisible for decades — and then they are suddenly visible in the best way.

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The Conversation Nobody Wants to Have... But Should

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Dr. Christensen also raised something that most health content doesn't touch: end-of-life planning.

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Not because it's morbid, but because women who have thought clearly about their wishes can deal better with unexpected health crises. This means completing advance care directives, having conversations with family, and making their wishes known. The Conversation Project is a resource she specifically recommends for starting those conversations with the people you love.

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Start Now: Your Super-Ager Action Plan for Your 40s

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You don't need to become a different person. You just need to implement a few habits consistently over time.

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This month:

• Add one resistance training session per week (if you're not already doing it)
• Address any sleep disruption you may have with your health provider
• If you are able to, schedule a DEXA scan to have a bone density baseline
• Share your health goals with someone you trust to get accountable

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This year:

• Complete an advance care directive (Hawaii has one available online)
• Audit your social connections: are you investing in them the way you invest in other priorities?
• Check your protein intake for muscle health
• See a menopause provider if hormonal symptoms are affecting your sleep, mood, or energy

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Frequently Asked Questions

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What do super-agers have in common? Research and clinical observation show that super-agers share psychological resilience, consistent physical activity, quality sleep, strong social connections, and a tendency to address health proactively rather than reactively.

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Can you become a super-ager if you haven't been healthy your whole life? Yes. The body has remarkable capacity for adaptation. Starting strength training in your 40s or 50s still produces significant benefits. Addressing sleep disruption has near-immediate cognitive benefits. Social connection can be built at any age. The best time to start was earlier; the second-best time is now.

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Does social isolation really affect aging? Yes, significantly. Chronic loneliness and social isolation are associated with increased risk of cognitive decline, cardiovascular disease, and early mortality. Strong social ties are consistently found in populations with exceptional longevity.

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What is advance care planning and why does it matter? Advance care planning involves documenting your wishes for medical treatment in case you become unable to make decisions yourself. It protects your autonomy, reduces burden on family members, and ensures your values guide your care.

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Gliss Wellness provides expert-based, affordable menopause care through our nationwide telehealth platform. Book a free 15-minute appointment at findgliss.com.

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